The most outrageous SUV ever

If ever a car was the complete opposite of green, this is it. The Brabus G V12 S Biturbo is a high-performance makeover of the utilitarian Mercedes G-Class 4x4 - and it posts some quite astonishing statistics...

What's all the fuss about?

Numbers, pure and simple. That's what the fuss is about with this absolute beast. They are: 690bhp and 811lb.ft of pulling power. To put that latter figure into perspective, a Ferrari F430 can muster 346lb.ft. The Brabus's CO₂ emissions are so tree wilting that Brabus won't even tell us what they are and if owners get close to 10mpg we'll eat our hemp trousers.

Any new technology?

There's no new tech on display here, just good old fashioned Brabus power-mongering and make no mistake. The G-Class isn't known for being high tech to begin with, and additions like daytime running lights and illuminated running boards don't change that. The V12 engine - taken from the Mercedes S600 - is a thoroughly highly stressed piece of performance engineering, though, with massive twin turbochargers, new camshafts and a bigger intercooler.

When can I buy one?

When you've saved up £335,000. Yes, you read that correctly: Brabus is asking £335,000 for this tarted-up old mud plugger. At that price you're almost certain never to pass one on the opposite side of the road, but then again you could also buy a supercar, a people carrier and a 4x4 of your choice, each of which will do better what this car sets out to do all in one vehicle. Amazing.

Mark Nichol