The Road to Nowhere

If big cities and traffic jams aren't your sort of thing, try this drive from Canada to Mexico through some of the United States' most remote regions and smallest, quaintest towns.

Draw a line on the middle of a map of the USA, cutting it in half from Canada to Mexico and you'll draw something that looks a bit like the US Route 83. The first fully-paved road linking the Americas, the US 83 is an oddball odyssey. It doesn't go anywhere you've heard of and doesn't pass any notable tourist attractions, which makes it a great escape from big city America.

ESSENTIAL INFO

Suggested route

Navigation isn't too much of a problem. Starting in Westhope, North Dakota, just south of the Canadian Border, this route follows the US 83 all the way down to the Mexican border.

The only opportunities to get lost are when the US 83 winds through small towns and the speed limit drops suddenly from 70 mph (112.6km/h) to a radar-enforced 25 mph (40.2km/h).

The first leg of 242 miles (389.4km) goes from Westhope to Strasburg, passing through Minot, Garrison, past the massive man-made Lake Sakakawea and state capital Bismarck - a (relatively) large town of 50,000 people with a 19-storey Capitol Building that dominates the surrounding prairies.

Strasburg itself has little of interest apart from a museum to polka legend Lawrence "Wunnerful" Welks. There was a four-lane bowling alley here but it burned down.

From Strasburg to Murdo, South Dakota is 189.3 miles of not-much-of-anything. There's 48 miles (77.3km) between Selby (population 736) and Agar (population 82) which has a useful filling station. South Dakota's state capital Pierre is the second smallest in the country with a population of 12,000 and a neat little museum.

Between Pierre and Murdo the US 83 scoots westward on the I-90 for 20 uneventful miles. Murdo itself has only 600 residents but it has a number of hotels: mostly mom-and-pop businesses but there are also a couple of chain motels.

The leg to McCook, Nebraska is 275.7 miles (443.7km) leading through the Rosebud Indian Reservation, Valentine (the first town in Nebraska), a long monotonous stretch between Thedford and North Platte (home of Buffalo Bill Cody), and on to Stockville. McCook is the place where KoolAid was invented and has a private home designed by renowned architect Frank Lloyd Wright.

Towns crop up a little more frequently through Kansas en route to Liberal. The town plays up Kansas's connection with the Wizard of Oz, with numerous Oz-themed businesses, including a recreation of Dorothy's home. But the town was not mentioned in the book, nor was it used as a filming location. It also has many of the major motel chains and a small air museum.

The next leg of 228.8 miles (369.8km) travels through Oklahoma's narrow panhandle (which has absolutely nothing of interest unless you need to refuel: in which case, stop in Turpin) before crossing the border into Texas. Stop in Canadian for some tasty donuts.

Paducah is a cotton town whose best days are long behind it. But it does have a steakhouse and a few mom-and-pop motels.

The next leg is 269.4 miles (433.5km) through Texas to Junction. It's a long drive from Paducah to the next settlement of Hamlin, so fill up with gas. Abilene is right in the centre of Texas and has been called the "buckle of the Bible Belt". With a population of 100,000 it's the biggest city on the route before Laredo and has a choice of restaurants and motels, not to mention the free Linear Air Park at Dyess Air Force Base.

Junction is 145.2 miles (233.7km) from Abilene. A wool and pecan-producing town, Junction has several eateries and places to stay. From Junction it's 102.3 miles (164.6km) to Uvalde, passing through the immodestly (and misleadingly) named Utopia. A mostly Hispanic town, Uvalde is worth visiting for its Grand Opera House and its Tex-Mex restaurants.

From Uvalde to Laredo is 129.6 miles (208.5km) passing through Crystal City (a huge statue of Popeye a monument to its spinach crop). Laredo is the first place to touch the Mexican border and has a mainly Hispanic population. There's a big choice of chain hotels but if you want to splash out, try the Spanish-colonial style La Posada Hotel.

The US 83 continues all the way to Brownsville, but our route finishes in Rio Grande City, 108.4 miles (174.5km) from Laredo.

GET THE MOST OUT OF YOUR TRIP

Worth getting out of the car for

South Dakota Cultural Heritage Center, Pierre - A fascinating insight into South Dakota life, this museum has collections illustrating the fur trade, native American heritage, cowboys and archaeology.

Pioneer Auto Show, Murdo - A collection of more than 300 classics, from muscle cars (Shelby Mustang) to unloved relics from the 1970s (AMC Pacer) plus a collection of motorcycles and tractors. The Pioneer Auto Show welcomes families and pets (on a lead)

Buffalo Gap Historic Village - A "living history" museum, Buffalo Gap is an authentic recreation of a frontier town in the early twentieth century. Experience what school was like in 1925 and see a collection of frontier weaponry in the recreated courthouse.

Events

29 September-3 October, 2009, Norsk Høstfest, Minot - Billing itself North America's Largest Scandinavian Festival, the Høstfest is a celebration of the American-Scandinavian culture that will be familiar to anyone who has seen the film 'Fargo'. Musical entertainment comes from headliners Frankie Valli and Reba McIntyre.

21-23 August, 2009, 130th Annual Rosebud Sioux Tribal Fair - Members of the public are invited to witness the Sioux tribe's annual sacred festivities (known as "wacipi" or "pow wow"). It isn't just a show for the sake of tourists, so be careful to respect the tribe's customs.

February, 33rd Laredo Jalapeño Festival - A celebration of the chilli pepper that's a staple of Mexican and Tex-Mex food, the annual Jalapeño Festival features competitive eating competitions (the record is 266 jalapeños in 15 minutes) and chilli cook-offs. Call 956-722-0589 for dates of the 2010 event.

Useful links